Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
in life, we have to deal with others every day.
in getting along with others, it is precisely our own abilities and abilities that are the most difficult for us to see and weigh.
as said in Laozi, "he who knows others is wise, and he who knows himself is wise."
when you understand the following three laws, you may make fewer detours and make fewer mistakes.
the Law of the platform
Don't mistake the platform for skill
there is a story.
there is a mouse who lives in the temple and is very proud. it can not only cross between floors at will, but also enjoy rich offerings.
the most important thing is that it lives behind the Buddha statue, and when people burn incense and kowtow, they worship it one after another.
wedding dresses under 200 are everlasting subject of fashion which show off your exquisite femininity. Worry free the minute you buy.
after a period of time, it gets carried away and feels very noble.
one day, a hungry wildcat broke in and caught the mouse. "you can't eat me! You should bow down to me! I represent the Buddha! " The "noble" mouse protested.
"people bow down to you only because of your position, not because of you." Said the wild cat sarcastically, and ate the mouse without hesitation.
there are many moments when we think we are great.
in fact, what others respect is not you, but your platform. It is not you that others admire, but where you are.
in the TV series "Joe's Courtyard", Sun Maocai was just a poor scholar selling peanuts on the street. Because he met Qiao Zhiyong, he was able to become the butler of Qiao's compound.
but then he expanded, always thinking that the business in Qiao's courtyard was all due to his meritorious service.
later, Qiao's rival, the master of Qian's family, invited him to dinner and flattered him, saying that Qiao's family gave him 3200 a month, and Qian's family could not give him 32000 a month.
so Sun Maocai was tempted. It happened that Sun Maocai was driven away by the Qiao family because of selfish desires. When he went to the Qian family and wanted to be the shopkeeper there,
and "lowering the price" was only three thousand 02:00, the master of the Qian family refused and gave him a sentence: it was not you who made the Qiao family business, but the Qiao family business that made you.
later, Sun Maocai fell into a state of ruin again. Once the scenery was boundless, after leaving Qiao's house, it completely disappeared.
never be a man and take yourself too seriously.
as Buffett once said:
many times, we only rely on the platform to show our ability.
once you leave the platform, you may be overshadowed or even useless.
it's no use knowing anyone if you're not good enough.
"when you're not strong enough or good enough, don't spend too much time socializing.
attend all kinds of parties. Spend more time reading, improving your professional skills, and seeing more of your customers."
in life, many people spend too much time and energy looking for friends, contacts, and so-called backers.
in fact, slowly you will understand that it is useless no matter who you know when you are not good.
entrepreneur Yu Minhong has seen the same young man appear beside him more than five times on different occasions, and every time he asks to take a picture with him.
so, once, Yu Minhong asked the young man why he was so keen to take pictures with himself. The young man replied that he wanted to mingle with more useful social connections.
at that time, Yu Minhong thought to himself that even his own brother would ignore him when he rushed back and forth like this on such a fleeting occasion.
but the young man was not soberly aware that he thought that as long as he took a photo with Yu Minhong, added a Wechat, or left a mobile phone number, they would become friends with each other.
in fact, the real network is not mixed up at all.
if you do not have the ability to know the best people, you will not be able to borrow the light from others, let alone be truly appreciated and recognized by others.
there is a successful person. When he was giving a class to the staff of an university, a young doctoral student asked, "
I am busy at work, but I often encounter some uninvited guests. I don't know if I should refuse. Will you lose your contacts?"
the successful person told the doctor that only good people can get useful social relations.
so the young doctor lamented that it was no wonder that few people came to him before he got his doctorate. In the future, he will spend more time on scientific research projects, instead of wasting time on ineffective social activities.
the so-called network is just one's own value.
when you are useful, even if you live in seclusion, contacts will come uninvited, and when you are useless, even if you push a cup for a change, contacts have nothing to do with you.
Law of face
Don't take an inch to be a man
as the saying goes, "A man lives a face, a tree lives a skin."
everyone wants to live a respectable life.
but face is nothing but politeness and respect given to you by others.
if you know yourself, others will treat you with courtesy. If you exceed your strength, you will only lose face.
in A Dream of Red Mansions, there is a character, Mother Li, who used to be Baoyu's wet nurse.
so she relied on this identity and held herself high in Jia's mansion until she completely angered Baoyu.
in the eighth time, Baoyu specially left a plate of beans at breakfast.With regard to the rotten steamed buns, he thought that Qingwen loved to eat, and even he even gave repeated instructions to Granny Zhen to save it for him to be delivered in the evening.
but when Baoyu asked Qingwen if she had eaten, Qingwen said, "Don't mention it. As soon as it was delivered, I knew it was mine. I just ate and left it there." Later, when Grandma Li came and saw it, she took it directly to her grandson to eat. "
at that time, Baoyu did not investigate immediately.
but when Baoyu suddenly remembered the morning tea after eating half a bowl of tea, he asked Qian Xue, "get up early and make a bowl of maple dew tea. As I said, the tea is excellent only after three or four times. How did you make this again?"
Xi Xue also replied awkwardly, "I kept it, but when Grandma Li came, he wanted to taste it, so I gave it to him."
hearing this, Baoyu threw his teacup to the ground with a clatter, smashed it and spilled Qian Xue's skirt of tea.
jumped up again and asked Qian Xue, "he is your grandma. Are you so filial to him?" It's just because I fed him for a few days when I was a kid.
now he is older than his ancestors. Now I can't eat milk again, what are my ancestors doing in vain? Get kicked out, everybody clean! "
in life, we often think that others give you face because you have face.
in fact, face can only be given by others, but not if it is not given by others.
Don't rely on others to remember your feelings and leave you with a sense of identity and superiority.
the more face others give you, the more measured you are. Once you take an inch, you will only lose face in the end.
in the final analysis, don't think too highly of yourself.
just like Liu Cixin once said in "three bodies":
when being sought after by others, you should know that maybe others are after your platform, not you.
when you want to build up contacts, know that it's no use knowing a lot of great people when you can't do it yourself.
when others save you face, you should know that when you are arrogant, you will completely lose other people's care and favor for you.
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