Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
there is a highly discussed topic on the Internet: what is the sign of a person's true maturity?
see an answer deeply rooted in the hearts of the people: even if the inner waves are rough, the surface can be light, you can adjust yourself at a low ebb, and you can stick to your heart when you are high.
if summed up in four words, it's probably: managing emotions.
the ancients said: do not promise when you are happy, do not speak when you are sad, do not fight when you are angry, do not decide when you are in chaos, and end when you are tired.
change yourself, starting with managing your emotions.
Don't get angry with your family, control your temper
have you ever experienced a moment when
when you are with friends, other people tell you what to do about your life, and you will smile and endure it in order to maintain a relationship, but when you get home, your parents' nagging makes you furious?
when you are under great pressure at work, when you encounter difficulties from customers everywhere, you will swallow your anger and not turn your face, but when you come home, your wife's concern gives you a reason to vent;
when you are worried about trifles, even if others challenge your bottom line, you will maintain your self-cultivation, but a cry from your child at home will make you furious.
there is a passage that clarifies the true appearance of adults:
"We are always respectful to strangers and complaining to our families.
all patience and tolerance are given to others, but the worst mood and worst side are left to those who are closest to them. "
the biggest anger is vented on the people who care about you the most, and the most hurtful words to the ones you love the most become regrets and regrets of how many people.
host Kou Naixin had such an experience:
once she quarreled with her husband over trivial matters, and she was afraid that she had lost the quarrel, so she picked the sore spot of her husband and hit back:
"what are you worthy of me? do you know that you are divorced and are secondhand goods? you don't deserve me at all!"
after hearing this, the husband was silent for a moment, then packed his bags and was ready to leave. Before going out, he turned around and said, "Nai Xin, you know, there are some words that cannot be said."
since then, Kou Naixin began to reflect: language is a sharp weapon to hurt people, even a kind of violence, and he may be a domestic violence.
every time you get angry, you keep your distance from your family; every part of your anger is a scar engraved on your family.
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in this world, no one takes it for granted that you have a bad temper.
treat family members, do not blame, usually forgive more, is a person's most basic self-cultivation.
as the writer Zhou Guoping wrote:
Don't let yourself sulk and keep a stable state of mind
when Li Na, a famous tennis player, won the French Open, she mentioned:
whenever he was cornered by the pressures of life, he always thought of this sentence.
as I get older, I feel more and more that "peace of mind" is actually the most precious gift of life to everyone.
during the short holiday not long ago, I made an appointment with my old friend Dashan to travel together and talked about each other's recent situation on the way.
Dashan sighed: "before the age of 30, I always used to suppress all my emotions in my heart."
work is not going well, emotional changes, big and small things not only overwhelm the heart, but also overwhelm health. "
until a serious illness, I didn't know that sulking can also destroy the human body.
since then, he began to look for ways to vent his emotions. Travel, sports and reading have made him much more peaceful.
there is a good saying: the state of mind is always balanced and the mood is always stable, which is also the way to live a long life.
when we walk in the world, we must understand that people do not live by mood, but by state of mind.
when one road is impassable, go another way, and when you don't understand one thing, change your mind to solve the problem.
there is an ancient temple in Amsterdam, and the stone tablet in the courtyard is engraved with a profound sentence:
"it has become a reality, it can only be so."
that is, if you can't change the result of something, you can change your mindset.
the best way to live in life is not to sulk, to let go of yourself, to be calm and calm.
Don't be too emotional and give up impulses
Mr. Lin Yutang once said:
"A person who has a clean mind, clear thinking, no superfluous emotions and delusions will bring sense of security to people.
because he does not hurt others or himself. Do not cause trouble, nor do you bother others.
to some extent, this is a kind of keeping precepts. "
what is harmless?
you don't hurt the innocent just because your emotions come to your heart. This is a precept to your own behavior.
what is not self-harm?
you don't get stuck in your heart because of an impassable hurdle. This is a precepts for distractions.
some time ago, the news that a ride-hailing driver was out of control and killed a passenger made many netizens call it scary.
at 2: 00 in the morning, Zhang and his girlfriend called a taxi on the online ride-hailing platform. Because the cell phone number previously reserved was now given to his father, for fear of disturbing the old man's rest, he sent a text message telling the driver, Gao, not to call.
but Gao still called after his arrival, which caused Zhang's strong dissatisfaction.
after getting on the bus, Zhang had a heated argument with Gao, the driver. During the argument, the driver refused to take Zhang and his girlfriend and asked them to get off.
after Zhang got out of the car, it was hard to calm his anger, so he picked up the drink bottle he had just finished and threw it at Gao's car.
who has ever thought, BenGao, who was about to leave, suddenly drove into Zhang and his girlfriend like "crazy", and finally Zhang was killed.
the most terrible thing in the world is to lose control of your emotions and make your life a victim of impulse.
when something happens, it is too emotional, and it is a disaster that destroys both yourself and others.
with age, not only experience, but also the ability to control emotions.
only by being calm, doing things rationally and managing your emotions well can you control your life.
abstain from impulse, let go of hostility, and be a stable person in order to make life a little more peaceful.
Don't be too negative. Stop consuming
American writer O'Henry tells a story in the Last Leaf of Ivy:
A young man was seriously ill and dying, and during the period of hospitalization, she often looked at a tree outside the ward window in a daze.
Autumn is coming, and the cold wind blows the leaves off the tree one by one, leaving little left.
Young people look at the almost bare vines, and their physical and mental conditions are getting worse and worse day by day.
she said, "when the leaves on the last ivy fall, I have to go, too."
an old painter heard this and painted a green leaf on the vine branch on the wall with a paintbrush.
until the end, the leaf didn't fall.
it is precisely because of this vitality that young people see the hope of life, and their health is getting better and better day by day.
there are so many moments in life that we think that negativity occupies the whole life, but in fact, all negative things are just episodes in life.
negative energy brings not only sadness and pain, but also self-consumption.
instead of dealing with the world with a negative attitude, it is better to face life positively.
I like what Professor Luo Xiang said:
"be cautious about things that can be controlled, and be optimistic about things that are out of control."
people can only do what they can. You have to accept it and deal with it with optimism. "
No matter where you are, don't forget to keep the bright moon in your heart and illuminate the world of life.
Farewell my Concubine
there is a line in Farewell my Concubine that impresses me particularly: people have to be on their own.
manage emotions, is to manage their own demons, to be the master of emotions, is the best way to achieve their own.