I wish we could go back to our junior year.
"Love" goes back to the past /Kawamoto Yoshiko. Nonsense, nonsense, nonsense | effort | fun | surprise | disorganized
I vaguely remember that in the summer when we first met, the first impression had nothing to do with good or bad feelings. I just thought your dress was a little special, but how could I think that in the days to come, you were important enough to change my life.
you say you are a slow and warm person, but you feel that you are more optimistic than anyone else. You can chat with people with all the classmates who set up the stage with you in the canteen. At that time, you had a rich extracurricular life, so we didn't spend much time together at that time. Until later, when you quit the school team, our relationship began to get better and better, until one day in the first semester of our junior year.
remember that day was in KTV. It seemed to be the first time I went to sing with you. You were sitting on the bar in your shirt. We sang Deng Ziqi's version of "like you" together. At that moment, I felt something throbbing in my left heart. I think it was at that moment that I fell in love with you.
We often eat together and go out to play together. I habitually hold your hand. We are always used to sharing an umbrella in the sun or rain, and sometimes you even hold or hug me. So much so that we were told by our classmates more than once that we were like lovers, and more than once my friends asked me if you were my boyfriend. This feeling is as beautiful and precious as a spring drizzle, but at the same time I also know that it is like a rose full of thorns. Later, I felt scared and dared not admit that I had fallen in love with you. My heart had not yet healed and told me that the beginning of such a love meant the end. Until the junior winter vacation, the whole holiday is always thinking about you, and finally can not help but admit that I have fallen in love with you.
in the second semester of our junior year, our relationship seemed to get better invisible. I began to be jealous and jealous. I didn't like you getting too close to other girls. At that time, I was like a child who had been given an inexplicable reward. How many times have I had the impulse to explain my feelings to you, but we are so familiar with each other that I am afraid that opening my mouth will push you back further and further away, but my heart hurts when I see you but can't tell you out loud every day.
one sunny afternoon, I finally plucked up the courage to say to you: I like you. The sudden confession scared you a lot, and then we didn't talk to anyone. As a result, you received a phone call that day. Something happened to your family and you were unhappy. I know it's not appropriate to talk to you at this time. I regret it the moment you say these words. I'm afraid we can't go back to the past. In the next few days, I felt that I was dark, no matter how violent the sun was. It rained in those days, and the raindrops clattered on my heart, which hurt.
finally one night, you found me on Wechat and we talked for a long time. I thought we could be together, but then you said you couldn't accept a long-distance relationship. Because we are already a junior, but you will go back to your house for an internship in a few months, and you, do not like the feeling of losing control. No matter how confident I am, no matter what I say, I can meet you where you are without fear of tiredness, but you still feel that I can't give you what you want.
you say you can meet when you want, you can have dinner with you, and you can send each other home. In fact, what I want is a simple happiness for two people, and so are you, but it is a pity that I can't give you such a simple happiness.
We have been different since that night. You seem to have started to avoid me and no longer take the initiative to talk to me. It seems that no matter how hard I try to talk to you, you always respond without being salty. Every dark night, I always think of how good we were before, your concern for me, you liked to say I was stupid, but suddenly thought, ah, this is the past, ah, this is no longer there.
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how can I go back to the past? every time I open my mouth, I will think that I have lost a friend. I don't want to make do with it, but I am even more reluctant to force you. I force myself to be busy, but when I calm down, all I can think of is that I just want to go back to the way I was with you.