A messy family cannot raise a good child.

the ancients often said, "those who are close to red are red, and those who are close to ink are black."

the environment deeply affects a person's growth. For children, the family is the child's first school and the parents are the child's first teacher.

the pros and cons of the growing environment determine whether an excellent child can be raised.

in other words, whether a child is good in the future depends to a large extent on whether the original family is nourishing or consuming the child.

01

families with messy rooms cannot raise hard-working children

as the saying goes, "if you don't sweep a house, how can you sweep the world?"

the condition of a family's room often hides the appearance of family life and the future of a child.

the Zeng family has the eight-character formula of running a family: morning, sweep, test, treasure, book, vegetable, fish, pig. This is a tradition left by Zeng Guofan's grandfather, Zeng Yuping. One of the "sweeping", that is, cleaning.

Zeng Guofan's grandfather, in his old age, even if he could do nothing, he would clean up the fields, homes and yards.

when it came to Zeng Guofan, he not only did it himself, but also wrote a letter to urge his younger brother: "the brothers are not easy to clean up. This is the atmosphere of losing the family."

the implication is that if the room is not clean and does not clean up, it means that you have no demands on yourself and no ambition. To muddle along like this is like a failure of the family.

when his son Zeng Jize became a family, Zeng Guofan also begged him to clean all the houses every day.

Zeng Jize carefully followed the family instructions and cleaned solidly every day. Not only swept the house, but also swept out the inner certainty and the stability of character, which laid a solid psychological foundation for him to become a famous diplomat in modern history.

most people of later generations marvel at the emergence of talents in the Zeng family for more than 200 years, so they deeply study their family letters and family mottos in order to educate their children. In fact, if we can start with the most basic cleaning, the excellence of the child has already begun.

"Zhu Zi Family precepts" begins by saying: "get up at dawn, sweep the court, and be neat inside and outside."

if parents are too lazy to clean up the room, their children will only be less likely to clean up and pay less attention to hygiene. A family with a messy room is doomed to raise hard-working children.

on the other hand, if parents can keep the room clean and tidy, children will be influenced imperceptibly, thus diligently tidying up their rooms, desks and schoolbags.

if you are diligent, all malpractices will be eliminated. A child who starts cleaning from an early age will bring the habit of "diligence" to his study and nourish himself with the harvest of "diligence".

on the contrary, if you are lazy, everything will not go well. When you find that your life is a mess, you might as well calm down and work with your children to wipe the table, fold the quilt, and mop the floor.

the home is clean and the heart is quiet. Get into the habit of cleaning every day, keep a clean home and raise a hard-working child.

02

families with work and rest disorders cannot raise children with self-discipline

as the ancients said, "get up early and panic late."

forming the good habit of going to bed early and getting up early is not only good for your health, but also makes your life orderly.

Li Hongzhang worked as an aide to Zeng Guofan's government when he was young. There is a rule in Zengfu: get up at dawn and all the staff members have breakfast together.

at breakfast time on a cold day, everyone arrived except Li Hongzhang. Zeng Guofan sent someone to call him, but Li Hongzhang lied about a headache and skipped breakfast today.

unexpectedly, Zeng Guofan sent someone to call again, with a sentence: "if you don't come, we won't eat."

Li Hongzhang was so frightened that he hurried over.

Zeng Guofan used to chat while eating, but this time, Zeng Guofan did not say a word all the time.

after dinner, Zeng Guofan said in front of Li Hongzhang, "now that Shao Quan has entered my curtain, I have something to say: there is only the word 'sincerity' here."

after listening, Li Hongzhang was "creepy for a long time", embarrassed and uncomfortable, and secretly determined to repent.

from then on, Li Hongzhang insisted on going to bed early and getting up early and made great contributions to the late Qing Dynasty, no matter whether he was on his horse to govern the army or to rule the country.

early to bed and early to rise, with four simple words, how many people have achieved, and how many people are out of reach.

A writer said, "early to bed and early to rise makes a man rich, wise and healthy."

in order to get their children into the habit of going to bed early and getting up early, many parents spare no effort, but with little success. Just because many people ignore a key factor: whether parents stay up late and get up late.

families with disordered work and rest are destined to be unable to raise children with regular schedule.

if parents can go to bed early and get up early, their children will follow suit and follow suit. This is a process of heteronomy.

over time, when a child can have a leisurely breakfast and do well in every class, he no longer needs the supervision of his parents.

because he really experienced the benefits of early to bed and early to rise. This is the process from heteronomy to self-discipline.

and this is the ultimate goal of education: teaching is not to teach, is to enable children to carry out self-education.

the plan of the day is in the morning. the world has been secretly rewarding those who go to bed early and get up early. From today on, start with yourself, teach by example, be a self-disciplined parent, and raise a self-disciplined child.

03

families with chaotic hearts cannot raise progressive children

Zhu Xi once said: "step by step, read well and think carefully."

Elegant and striking, nobody should be without our dressy attire that conceals abdominal fat. This is the part for the unique, as you.

Children's education is not achieved overnight, eager for quick success and instant benefits will be counterproductive. Jia Dairu in A Dream of Red Mansions is a typical representative of anxiety education.

he putThe hopes of three generations are pinned on his grandson Jia Rui, and he is easily beaten and scolded, which is not allowed, nor can it be said to completely ignore Jia Rui's inner world and emotional needs.

there is a scenario like this.

Jia Rui was tricked by Wang Xifeng and froze all night in the cold wind of the cold winter month, and finally got home. Jia Deru did not show any concern, but decided that he either drank or gambled and immediately imposed a heavy penalty.

first of all, he hit 30 or 40 boards so hard that he was not allowed to eat, and then he was made to kneel in the courtyard to read the article and be sure to make up for ten days of homework.

similar stringent education is often performed, so that Jia Rui's heart is full of grievances, fear and submission, naturally no mood for progress, but ended up eating, drinking, whoring and gambling.

there is no doubt that Jia Dairu's family education is a failure.

however, although history does not repeat itself, it is always strikingly similar. Nowadays, many parents have unconsciously stepped into the educational dilemma of "Jia Dairu style".

wanting to communicate with the child turns into nagging and accusation, which fills the child's heart with irritability; wants to make the child more outstanding, makes the child feel more anxious. Want the child to listen to himself, turned into shouting, so that the child's heart is full of fear.

all the experiences of irritability, anxiety and fear will accumulate in the child's heart and consume the life energy originally used for learning and growth.

A family with inner chaos is doomed to be unable to raise progressive children.

A philosopher said: "Education is not him, but the turn of the heart, leading children to love, goodness and wisdom."

A good education is not harsh criticism, not coercion, but to awaken the inner strength of the child.

raise a child who is confident in his heart so that he can slow down, calm down, see the road ahead and move forward one step at a time.

▽

everything happens for a reason.

the room is messy and comes from habits, so it is impossible to raise diligent children.

the disorder of work and rest stems from role models and cannot raise children with self-discipline.

inner chaos, derived from the atmosphere, can not raise an enterprising child.

A messy family is not doomed to raise good children.

being a parent is not only a life experience, but also a self-cultivation.

May every parent be a beacon in their child's life, guard all the way, guide all the way, and protect the child's growth.